From a young age, author Benjamin Plumb, aka THE SATISFIED INTROVERT (A Memoir About Finding Safety in an Extroverted World), is made aware of an unspoken pressure to become extroverted. From this came his development of a ‘recipe’ – a strategy for tackling situations that do not come naturally to introverts. And for a while, this served him well. However, while this coping mechanism proved effective in some situations – such as delivering presentations at school – it did not fare so well in affairs of the heart. When Plumb becomes entangled with the confident and exotic Anabela – his first serious romantic interest – he learns to speak Portuguese, her native language. Speaking another language offers the young man a layer of protection, in the sense that he is ‘performing’, hence removed from his authentic self. Nevertheless, Plumb draws comfort from his ‘recipe’ and calls upon it repeatedly in his personal relationships, describing it as something that helps him navigate a ‘safe path’ through a ‘scary, extroverted world.’ Yet he is forced to acknowledge that his ‘winning recipe had failed to bring [him] romantic success’ – Plumb’s narrative sees him experience several promising relationships that come to naught, a failed marriage, as well as struggles within his career. It is in the closing stages of his marriage to Ida that he experiences something of a slow-burn epiphany: his introversion is not a character flaw to be disguised, but an asset ripe for development.
From the standpoint of a somewhat wiser old age, Plumb finds himself able to share a fundamental truth: the coping mechanism that he (like many introverts) had constructed served only to ‘lock in’ the ‘very anxiety’ it was intended to counter. One of the pivotal moments in the author’s change of direction is in the form of a book–Quiet: The Power of Introverts in A World That Won’t Stop Talking by Susan Cain; a training course was another powerful influence. Both helped trigger a change in mindset and behavior. Quite early in this memoir, the author cites that, according to Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, half of the sixteen personality types involve some degree of introversion. He is implicitly interrogating why, therefore, it is the introverts of the world who feel the need to adapt to suit societal expectations? With the confidence that comes from age and experience, Plumb learns that his introverted characteristics – sharp focus, attention to detail, a steady pace – are of value, and should be celebrated rather than eschewed. Indeed, embracing this concept led to a happier, more fulfilled and ‘free’ life for the author.
Many readers will glimpse themselves in some of Benjamin Plumb’s anecdotes and may well identify with his ‘recipe’ for disguising his introversion. And while it took him over six decades to accept and enjoy his authentic self, readers have the opportunity to learn the hard lessons vicariously from his experiences – and enjoy the impact.
~Amanda Ellison for IndieReader