The Year in Years

It’s looking like this one is going to come in at just about…one year. A good length for a year.

The Year in What’s Important

A bunch of personal stuff happened to me, almost all of it boring and repetitive. My band The Ks broke up.

The Year in Music

Did that Taylor Swift song about never getting back together come out this year, or was that three years ago? Everything else involved parody videos with telephones and horsey dances. Little-known but influential “cult” band The Ks broke up.

The Year in Politics

Barack Obama won a decisive victory so he could cut Medicare.

The Year in Art

For yet another year, most people don’t give a crap about art.

The Year in Television

Watched a LOT of television.

The Year in Movies

The Year in Movies is in my Netflix cue.

The Year in War

Quiz: How many wars are we in? Can you name the leader of the countries we’re at war in? Can you find those countries on a map?

The Year in Gun Violence

Yeah, we don’t want the government taking our guns away, but they’re really NOT, so can we do something about gun control now?  Not taking away the guns, people, just controlling them a little. Maybe one of these nut-jobs will get stalled on some paperwork and we can have a couple fewer massacres. Can we?

The Year in Weather

Earth’s getting hotter. We’re going to have to move our cities inland, island people are going to have to grow gills, there’s going to be a global exodus, and the conversation in the U.S. is “Hey, winter still HAPPENS! WHAT global warming?” Look at a picture of the ice caps. We’re going to have to try harder.

The Year in Publishing

My sources tell me the hottest trend in literature is independent publishing.

The Year in 50 Shades of Grey

Got it in!

The Year in Economics

Pretty crappy!

The year in Adorable Animal Videos

Unlikely animal friends! The dog that waits for the kid to splash in a puddle! The dog crying and playing piano! The lion that remembers and doesn’t eat his old masters! Those little babies shaking their heads while their dad plays guitar! Okay those aren’t really “animals,” except that we’re all animals, but I’d still put them in a different category. Adorable! A banner year!

The Year in Social Media

This is the year I think everybody calmed down a little about social media. Let’s all go back to myspace, just to mess with people’s heads.

The Year in 2013

That’s the future! Exercise more and get more politically active. We’ve got to do something about the earth getting hotter. Also, party more!

The Year on Mars

You know they’re gonna find the tip of the Martian version of the Statue of Liberty or something like that up there. Just a matter of time.

The Year in Generals

Petraeus is no Eisenhower. Interesting fact: He used to be General Petreus but was awarded an extra vowel by George W. Bush for his handling of the Iraqi surge. Now the people of Iraq are at peace.

The Year in General

Yeah, let’s do better in 2013.